Monday was a good day...
I was feeling pretty low and upset with my actions the previous night, so Jason consoled me and didn't even know it. We took a nap from 2:30 till 7:00pm; it was nice to have someone hold me and make me feel better about myself. I honestly felt sick to the point of running hastily into the bathroom to spit up the horrible things I did to make me feel so dirty. I wasn't thinking at all, and now I've got him calling me all the time needing more than just a platonic relationship. I thought I made it clear a week ago that I'm not at all interested in a serious relationship. Oh dear...
Jason and I are doing good. We spent the night together on Monday and had a lot of fun. We made a trip to super wal-mart for some bathroom supplies then made "baby cakes" without any eggs. I was almost positive that the cake mix would turn to shit and they'd be bland to the point where no amount of icing would help; however, I was mistaken and reminded all night of how delicious they were. We were feeling greedy and didn't bother to tell the other people that we bought Arbor Mist, so we quietly and happily sipped it in his room like little kids eating stolen cookies behind the couch. I wasn't drunk because it was a school night, but we still had fun.
Tuesday me and Tiffany went to Carrabbas (what else is new?) and I saw Ben My Love. I remembered how I blew him off last month because I was with Jason but I played it off as though he did it to me "Agian". So I gave him my number agian and I was over there last night at his house. He's got a cute home and adorable pugs that snort and run around like Harlee did. We watched a movie and we caught up on old times of how he dicked me over and how much I liked him. He's a changed person considering the SERIOUS conversation (he was voted class clown last year and purposely grew a mullet for graduation...need I say more?) and the seemingly genuine tone. We fell asleep in his bed and he didn't touch me at all except to hold my hand, which was sweet of him and suprisingly refreshing.
Tonight he's taking me to the Tampa Theatre and to walk around afterwards, which doesn't sound like him AT ALL but I'm not judging him anymore. Hopefully I can stay over there agian cause his bed is like no other I've laid in before. It's a king size, cotton ball as I like to call it.


I've been very miserable lately and haven't had the time to sit and really write about it. Lately I have just been writing to remember, not to display any sort of talent. My life is changing and things are rearranging, and I don't want to lose it.

*Mom says if I take the motorcycle class that teaches me about safety and how to ride I can get a used bike* <---Holy Shit somebody get me a tissue my underwear is saturating in joy.